If you happen to know me in person, you would know that I am generally the happy easy going type. I try to avoid conversations that would lead to having to say what I feel about certain stuff. I hate confrontations and somehow I save all the drama for myself and for my blog.
But lately I have been lost and confused, I have been asking myself serious questions and tried to separate myself from the crowd in order to get the inner peace that I wanted. And that is the reason why answering the serious question “how are you” makes me uncomfortable.
A while ago, I opened my first blog and contemplated on my old writings. My last post was all about my rants on not having to get what I wanted in life. I was just starting Urban Dai that time and somehow reading those last words that I wrote made me realize that I am now this person that I wanted to be a year ago.
And that’s when I felt the guilt, the guilt of even having second thoughts about my decisions in life. I am here, climbing my way up the hill to fulfill my dreams, but somehow in the middle of the journey I felt unhappy, misunderstood and frustrated. Maybe it’s because of the fact of having to let go of the things that used to make me happy in or maybe it’s because I couldn’t seem to get the personal away from the business.
Whatever the answer maybe, there is certainly no point in giving up, I will not let the past bring me down, I will live the present, however rough the ride maybe and see a clear and bright future. And I want this, I want this so bad.
ZARA top/ZARA skirt/F21 necklace/F21 bag/JC Lita/BingBang x WeSC bracelet